But for my mother, I would not have known the importance of the “Blue
Conch Flower”.
It is a truth which I repeat to myself every morning when I
pluck the flowers for worshipping Lord Shiva. While doing so, I see my mother wrapped
in a freshly hand washed cotton sari, her wrinkled skin radiating with golden glow,
a dot of ash firmly placed on her forehead, her back slightly bent with age,
going around our balcony and touching the creepers full of blue conch flowers.
Even today I hear her telling me in her strong and clear
voice “Son, take these seeds and put them
in another flower pot. More and more creepers will come up”. Her short
afternoon nap over, she used to tend to the creepers by pulling away weeds from
the pots. She used to distribute the seeds to family and friends with the joy of spreading happiness around.
Realisation is the key to awakening
Oblivious I was, I could not share her joy in tending to the
creepers, plucking the flowers or distributing the seeds to friends and family
members. I saw the blue conch flower just
as any other flower and did not attach any importance to it. Her
demise changed everything completely. More than the flowers, I saw her
image in each and every flower and felt her absence more and more. Sitting in
the swing placed in the backyard, I imagined her going around the creepers,
touching them lovingly and musing “they
are so perfectly shaped as a conch; Lord Shiva will be pleased when I worship
him with these flowers”.
Today, when I look at the flowers, pluck them for worship
and offer them to the Lord, I feel the presence of my mother in every activity.
I see her nodding her head happily as if she is pleased over the continuation
of a relationship between nature, human being and the God almighty.
Down the memory lane
Recently, I started thinking if there are any more things
which I did not share with my mother when she was alive but seem to be of
relevance and worth appreciating now. As I went down the memory lane and
started viewing my actions and reactions in my relationship with my mother, I
realized that I could have done better. “Why
did I fail to understand my mother better? Was it due to lack of flexibility in
me or preconceived notions guiding my thoughts and actions? Did I hurt my
mother and what can I do now to bring happiness to her departed soul”?
Going down the memory
lane made me notice many instances in which I failed to act with tenderness and
see clearly the occasions on which I hurt her. She took everything in her
stride and was as tender towards me as her golden hued tender skin.
Just as I was
thinking, my eyes fell on the Blue Conch Flowers and heard them say silently
“Your mother loved us a lot and saw her beloved God in us. You can bring
happiness to her departed soul by continuing what she did; be tender towards us
and see the Lord in us”. I stood silently and nodded my head as a child
nods his head obediently to what his parents say.
The blue conch flowers went ahead and said “There is something more which we would like
to tell you. Keep emptying all the preconceived notions from your heart and
mind to leave enough space in them to see and appreciate things as they are
happening. Else, you may have to go down the memory lane very often to make
amends”
I remained silent and
said to myself “Thank you my dear
flowers. The sole purpose of my going down the memory lane was to purify my
soul and you have helped me achieve my objective”
